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tumblr_ms5kgoXcGj1syuvebo1_1280Special Offer but, before you do…

This blog is about gay acrobats, their life and times, their adventures, their love, their love of fitness and, above all, their story, as told in three connected books which get promoted in the posts from time to time! The books are available in both paper form and as e-books from the usual web outlets. We want you to enjoy the pictures and the episodes of our life and times which get posted here, and we also hope that you’ll enjoy a good read…

bc48789155991bicep…wherever you hang out! Feel free to comment, or if you prefer something more private, use e-mail to – always happy to have your thoughts and opinions!

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

Now read on, and join us ‘Living the Dream’…

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‘When Two or Three are Gathered Together…’


Young lads checking out their progress. Wanting to look good for themselves. For the girls… or, in more limited cases like Dave and I (!!) for the boys. But then, we’re not young any more. At ages 11 or 12, the three young ‘uns staying here with us in Wales are definitely into the girls, but there are none here. They are also definitely into fitness and acrobatics big time, and that’s for themselves. And, more importantly, for each other. The support they give each other, and the care they seem to have instinctively not to try and out-do one another, is humbling and inspirational.

So, today’s theme is support and encouragement in the pursuit of fitness and great looks, whatever sport or level of muscle you are after. Gay or straight – makes no difference. It can be as simple as complimenting each other in the locker room:

lockerroom lads

Offering a bit of much-needed massage or stretching (and having a bit of fun at the same time…):


Time taken chilling out:


…before attempting something that definitely requires good coordination between the partners:



Partners who are gay may, of course, take things a little further, especially in their ‘chillin’ time:


The straight guys, we assume, get the same love and attention from their wives and/or girlfriends. Maybe both… It is a necessary part of the process.

As far as the kids are concerned, support from adults – and guidance in their training – is essential too. With the amazing run of good weather here in Wales (now cooling off slightly with the odd downpour) the three boys vacationing here have had the time of their lives, able to run free/wild in an empty landscape of low mountains, rivers and woodland. Such a contrast to so many kids who stay glued to their i-pods/pads or the TV even in the sunniest weather. Whereas, our three little Tarzan’s are glowing with pride at their fitness, their suntans, and the chance they’ve had to just “be boys”.

Internet mate Ian (and BOOK READER, bless him – see below, guys) from southern England sent me this. As he pointed out, ‘this says it all’.

tumblr_n8m7lcIL1u1teo92co1_1280 (640x640)

Actually, it could say a few other things, as he subliminally left for me to figure out. But let’s not go there!

The first book...My chance to do that stuff started well before the events in this first book, in which Dave and I discovered our gay love for each other and our addiction to acrobatics and weight training. No, it was with my best friend Colin (later to be Ollie’s dad, the 11yo I mentioned), aged about six, when we enjoyed halcyon summer days by the Oxford canal, skinny dipping and trying out gymnastics and acrobatics on the bank in the summer sun. VERY early posts in this blog cover all that.

Cover2 FullThe second book takes up where the first ends – with the conception of my own son (and, indeed, of Dave’s daughter). Yes. Gay dads, begged by two lovely lesbian girls to give them what they wanted… oh, how we agonised. But the joys that the kids have brought us are just too much to say here. So glad we did it… On that occasion, four of us were gathered together… and we did have support from quite a few of our gay friends too…

Cover 3 FullFinally, the third book continues the experience of touring with a circus and of things going scarily wrong for a while. What that means I leave you to discover for yourselves… books are to be bought and read, after all! Click on a cover and also remember that the e-books are out there in the usual places.

So what’s the message? “Gather together”. You’ll support and encourage one another in whatever you are seeking to achieve. In our case that was acrobatic skills and fitness… wanting to be looking great for an audience to admire us as well as the balances and stuff. We’re wearing out a bit now, and looking to the next young generation to carry our banner forward as we drift more into coaching. Which said:


Yes, WHATEVER your age!! It’s not just a matter now of standing back and trying to keep the looks, just because we’re reaching our mid-30s:


(although we do!).. no, it’s about driving the others forward. Helping with flexibility:



weight training rules OK

…balance (this is the stunning British lad Edward Upcott on his pedestal):

upcott 1450275_669383119749038_631306561_n

Yup. Driving on… by example, and by applying the knowledge. Building the confidence to show off what you have achieved, encouraging each other ‘so long as one of us wins and the other comes second!’ …


…as this next picture clearly indicates, you’ll have STAMINA, DETERMINATION, stand for SUCCESS AND NOTHING LESS, and CONQUER the opposition (and a mate to take your posed pictures and leak them onto the internet)…


Go on. Grab your mate and “get physical”!! Oh, go on, you know what I mean…


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One year ago the sweet lady shopkeeper in our nearby little town here in Wales defended my son Leo going barefoot into her shop against a miserable Saturday girl who worked there – who had shown no interest in the insanitary wellies of a smelly old farmer tramping sheep muck across the floor and coughing over the carved ham…

This year, same sweet lady has defended our reputations and the safety of the assorted kids staying here following the mean claptrap of a couple of women trying to brand us as inevitable paedophiles (see last post). ‘Inevitable’ because we are gay. That lady, at least, surely understands what it means to love someone (in my case, another man, Dave) but can understand that I would protect my son and his friends to the last breath if I had to from any other person, gay or straight, who threatened them in any way. That’s ANY way. And she certainly understands that my son and the others here are safe from me. And keeps praising us up to anyone who will listen!

What is doubly interesting is that this all came out not when we went into the shop, but when MY MUM did!! That’s the same mum whose gradual acceptance of her son’s sexuality is one of the themes in these:

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

I did drop into the shop yesterday to thank her… along with three happy barefoot AND shirtless boys. I like that shop…

Yes, my mum’s here now, along with my dad. The three boys (Leo, his 12yo friend from Oak Ridge – Chris, and 11yo [as of yesterday] Ollie from Oxford, son of my oldest friend) – they haven’t had a shirt on their backs for a week, and Dave and I pretty much the same. Amazing weather in the UK just now, so the young ‘uns are swimming in what’s left of our river, wrestling in the mud, clambering over rocks (territory like in the top picture), sleeping out in a bivouac… gone native, really, which is exactly what 12yo boys ought to be doing rather than having their heads glued to electronic devices (as my father puts it).

Yesterday after noon there was a sudden sharp shower – all of us (well, not my mum and dad actually) out in it shirtless and really enjoying the cooldown.

It really has been this sort of weather…


…acrobats like enjoying the sun too! We’ve been letting the kids roar around naked, actually, but now my mum is here, well, the shorts or speedos stay on…


At least, outside our little gym they do – the boys are determined to keep developing their muscles and skills, so we’re all in there early in the morning, something my mother would never rise early enough to see…


and, of course, no training opportunity outdoors is lost either:



Our nearest sandy beach is about an hour and a half away (we have to kind of do a huge loop around the Cambrian mountains) but sea temperatures off the UK coast are currently the highest they ever get – nearly 20C!! – so we’re obviously making good use of that too. We’re well used to maintaining our suntans over in Tennessee, but kind of expected to lose them here! Not this year…

sun tan


sunny boy

All of this great weather, plus the few days when Dave and I were here alone after he went on tour for four weeks and I couldn’t, have meant a really relaxing opportunity to just be ourselves. Togetherness – for ourselves, and along with family and friends. We’re all feeling rather good, actually, and not just through overdosing on Vitamin D!


We have done a little bit of work – there’s always a lot to do here… even late into the evening it has been shirtless weather.


So, there’s more fun in the sun to come…


Can’t believe our luck, really!


…and each day, when the kids are safely asleep (and, for the moment, my parents too!), it’s that special time when Dave and I can share those simple words that mean so much: I Love You


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“If They’re Gay, the Kids must be At Risk…”


Bad vibe from the local town today: first time ever here in Wales.

I’ve commented a lot on how friendship between young guys helps them both (or all) to develop their interests, sports and so on – driving each other forward and helping each other to keep it up and improve.

So it is with son Leo, and his friends Chris and Ollie here in Wales (ages 12 or [just] 11) – the first two (USA based) don’t get to meet up with Ollie (from UK) that often but their close friendship and drive continues through Skype as they compare notes on their training. Not so surprising, then, that they have been Skyping to the fourth member of their ‘fitness freaks’ gang, back in Tennessee. He’s the son of the essentially homophobic guy who tried initially to destroy his son’s friendship with my son because of his having a gay dad and lesbian mum. The guy who later warmed sufficiently to our fitness skills to let his son join in with the others, and has visited our home a few times, meeting our gay friends and the two lesbian mums of Leo and Jaymee.

Now this guy has been seeing pictures of the fun the others are having here in UK. I knew the boys had been Skyping to ‘Ryan’ but not that his father had come on screen and been watching the developments. Turns out he’s envious that his son isn’t here with the others. Well, RYan could have been, if the guy had been a bit more trusting and generous with his dollars! Maybe seeing a woman on our end in the background (Ollie’s mum) convinces him that we’re not out to run some sort of gay indoctrination centre and entrap his son!

We may be gay but we’re not into indoctrination – just into fitness. Yes, as gay guys, fit male bodies interest us, but as dads and de facto guardians (of Chris) we’re absolutely not into kids and certainly not into our offspring’s mates.

Hence my cynical ‘quote’ in the title. People need to wake up to the fact that gays (and especially gay parents) are just as loving, responsible and caring of their kids and other kids in their care as any straight people would be. Ryan’s dad has completed about 75% of ‘the course’ now and willingly admits that his son’s physical development and confidence since coming to us for training has been substantial. Score there, then.

Yet our friend Tom, from the nearest little town, heard that comment I’ve put in the title from some woman who obviously knows about us and where we live here when he was in some shop or other. As a gay man himself, he was aghast, but he and his partner Iestyn have had to put up with some unpleasant stuff themselves, especially as Iestyn is a local school teacher.

‘Gay’ does not mean ‘paedophile’, people, despite what you might read in the newspapers.

Please could we have our private lives back for ourselves, not to be discussed willy-nilly down in the town?

Cover1 ThumbCover2 ThumbCover 3 ThumbMaybe if I had left a few of these lying around in the town, such people could confirm their worst fears! Shock horror: gay love and relationships, occasionally graphic; acrobatics and circus stuff, and some adventure for good measure. Maybe not the stuff of rural Wales, then! On the other hand, if you’re reading this far, maybe click on the covers! e-versions available.

And now, the regular fitness ‘fix’. Enjoy.


56thb70 (1)





As I suggested, groups develop quicker than individuals…


…but just one training partner can work the magic…

shoulder stretch (small)

(sorry, that one won’t expand)


Such partnerships can develop in various ways…



…or, if those are a bit extreme, just in the gym competing to improve their muscle:


tumblr_n0wwhbIuys1sj11ofo1_1280So, we are what we are, and no gossiping women in the local shop can change that. We can admire fit guys, yet still be perfectly responsible in our duties to kids or, indeed, to anyone else. We just need a few more people to recognise that, I guess.

Meanwhile, the boys continue to enjoy themselves in the current amazingly hot weather regardless of our encounters with assorted anti-gay prejudices, under careful supervision which includes Ollie’s parents as well as ourselves. They will return home at the weekend (leaving Ollie here) but will be replaced by my parents, so I’ll be under the watchful gaze as well! It took my parents a long while to accept my gayness (see the books), but we got through that in the end and they adore their grandson and everything he does.

Sporty boys love doing what they do, and long may it continue!



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The Fit Generation


Watching my 12yo and his two young friends indulging in ‘fitness’ activities 18 hours a day here in the unexpectedly warm and sunny Welsh hills is inspirational for all of us here – my partner Dave and I, and my good friend Colin and his wife (plus younger daughter). The boys are keen to impress us with everything they do (after all, son Leo has been working with a circus for 4 weeks alongside Dave and the others!), so the days are filled with constant wrestling, swimming, acrobatics and tumbling, diving into the barn for weights for a while… overall, making the adults feel quite breathless!



What is really impressing us is that there is no actual competition between the three boys to be ‘the best’. Just as Dave and I (and our friends back in TN) have always done, it has been a case of wanting and encouraging each other to ‘keep up’. Yes, of course there is playfighting and wanting to be the ‘winner’, but if one of them masters (say) a new balance, immediately he is supporting the others in achieving the same result. Makes us three ‘dads’ feel rather good about the philosophy we have obviously passed on to the next generation!

More of our activities here in 3 books:

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

…the story of our (gay) love, acrobatic endeavours, performances and adventures. Give ‘em a try? (e-books available, Amazon etc.).

Which said, let’s open the customary photo gallery for today! You could start by trying out a simple ‘stand on shoulders…


…supported by suitable strength exercises, of course:


Inside the gym too…



10534655_679381275483543_4613483094755172382_n… it’s not just muscle gain, but that overall ‘good’ feeling about yourself! Enjoy the open air (northern hemisphere at least) whilst summer lasts!


reach up


You can still enjoy by moonlight…


Surf’s up!


beefy swimmer

Make sure you have FUN as well as work out hard:


(slightly photoshopped, that one!)


Keep up the effort, and it won’t be long before you can see those all-important ‘rips’…



And remember, ‘doing it together’ helps to bring everyone along faster…


(check out those abs!)

Who said the ‘stag’ stance was only for the ladies?


So, whatever generation you are, WAKE UP!! – get fit and be a ‘game changer’!









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Sexual Chemistry for Beginners

noah kane 01

The British Sunday papers afford some interesting reading, and it was a piece about whether male sweat attracts women that caught my attention at the weekend. So here, being a gay guy’s blog, we’ll adapt that slightly (!) and discuss how male sweat attracts other gay males…

sweaty gym guy 2

It seems to be a case of ‘New sweat good, old sweat bad’ – at least as far as the ladies are concerned.

Well, we all get pretty sweaty in the gym…


good work

…and I quite like it when other guys get close…

SP010812 (189)

…because it always makes me horny. So many gay wrestling bouts end in (at least) a jerk-off… Well, now I know.


Fresh male sweat is rich in androstenol. This is a fatty-acid alcohol and is attractive to females and any guys who like men. After about 20 minutes in the air, it becomes oxidised to a ketone, androstenone, which is significantly less pleasing to the girls. But, you know, I rather like that as well, especially as in most cases any partner I’m training with (I nearly said ‘playing with’) is still producing the ‘good’ chemical by the bucketload alongside the oxidised form.

And they wonder why gay guys like to get up close and shirtless!


hand in hand


The Sunday Times piece goes on to say that the sexual magic only works (for the ladies) at a distance of less than 18 inches. All I can say is – the writer should visit our gym… the scent hits you as you open the door…

If you are likely to be excited by the aroma of hot males, then you might be excited by these:

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

our story of finding gay love, coming out, indulging in body-contact sports and acrobatics, having fun, and having a few scares! e-books available from the usual sources…

The first book...Now, where was I? Oh yes… hot male bodies. Right then:





But this post is all about getting up close to one another…


…and, OK, comparing your muscles as well as your, erm, odours…



…and muscles are for being used, if only for some nefarious activity…


Two fine specimens!

And, of course, for Dave and I, it is definitely the scent of the armpits to ‘rouse’ us, first thing in the morning. And, by the way, we don’t share our bed with a dog…




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Boy Heaven (Don’t Jump to Conclusions…)


My old friend Colin and his wife brought their two kids, my son and his friend Chris down to the cottage in Wales yesterday. There aren’t many opportunities for kids to run totally wild these days, but here at Cefn Derwen, perhaps this is one of them. No-one else for miles, trees to climb, a swimming hole in the river, warm weather plus the occasional warm downpour to liven things up…

These are fit kids, as this blog regularly tells, so as soon as they arrived it was no shirts or shoes and off into the wild, returning to the house only for food and drink. The first time they came back they were down to underpants; after that nothing. Chests smeared in mud, wrestling, happy…

They decided to bivouac for the night, so Dave, Colin and I helped to construct something reasonably waterproof. I sneaked out early this morning to check they were OK, and peered in. Three naked boys, a jumble of arms and legs, the blankets we had issued long-since kicked off, but warm and sleeping peacefully. ‘The bestest friends in the whole world’, as Colin’s nearly 11yo Ollie puts it.


Did we join in any of this stuff? You bet. Colin and his wife Natasha are ex-gymnasts and seriously fit too. And, of course, we have our little gym here, and everyone makes good use of that. ‘Tash and Ollie’s little sister are a little less extrovert than the rest of us, and volunteered to make dinner whilst the rest of us pretended we were carefree 12yo’s again.


Colin’s not gay, of course, although he knew I was when we were aged about 12, long before I did: but Dave and I have had plenty of gay fun too with our local friends Tom and Iestyn. They are keen squash players and runners, and use our weights here, so are very fit: very keen to wrestle with us and get up close and nakedly comfortable (we draw the line at full (ahem) insertion, as both couples have codes to follow), but pretty much anything else can be shared!



Cover1 ThumbCover2 ThumbLet’s just make one thing clear, for people who worry about such things. My life as a gay dad with a loving partner Dave and our friends is totally separated from my life as a loving father of a seriously straight boy and his straight friends, and the issues are never mixed. Son Leo fully understands our situation and has grown up with his lesbian mum in her relationship and me in mine. He feels blessed to effectively have two mums and two dads (as does Dave’s daughter, who has remained in Tennessee this vacation) and these books describe how I found gay love, became a gay dad, enjoyed our sports and circus life and got into a bit of trouble with my friends along the way.

Cover 3 ThumbI feel obligated to make this statement (especially in a post with this title) since last week the British authorities made plain that they have evidence against ten thousand (yes, 10,000!!) alleged paedophiles and have arrested 660 of them… we are NOT, ABSOLUTELY NOT, into that, and the assorted kids can run around this place half naked without any risk from us. Dave and I coach gymnastics at all ages, and both of us have child-protection qualifications and criminal-record checks in place. Just saying…

…especially as, like most gay guys, we enjoying looking at pictures of fit young men. And, as Colin has just pointed out after peering over my shoulder at what I am writing here, that his wife Natasha likes looking at fit young men as well!!!

So, ‘Boy Heaven’ – that post title, simply refers to how the kids view this place. Actually, it’s ‘heaven’ for boys of all ages, including ourselves. And probably also for any girls that get to come here, it’s ‘Girl Heaven’ too.

Read the tattoo:


OK, sermon over. Actually I never intended to say all that when I started – it’s just kind of come out.

Even ‘Ryan’s homophobe dad (Ryan is the fourth member of the transatlantic Leo/Chris/Ollie “fit boys” partnership, back in TN!)  was finally convinced he could trust us with his son’s training after initially forbidding him even to have contact with Leo outside school (where he couldn’t prevent it).

Respect for our kids (and for ALL kids), respect for individual’s lifestyles, and respect for guys who have clearly put in the effort to build great physiques!



speedo from below


red undies strong






So there we are, a fair old selection. Colin and ‘Tash have invited us all for a pub lunch, so time to stop. Guess the kids will have to put an actual shirt on for that!! Better go and yell for them to come in, and clean them up!

Remember, gay or straight, it’s OK to have fun with your same-sex friends, especially in public:


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Busy Doin’ Nuthin…


A superb start to our break in Wales. Youngsters left in Oxford until the weekend, no-one else here, blazing sunshine… sunbathing naked, needing no more than a pair of brief shorts all day (we can hear anyone like the postman showing up here long before they get up the track!). Dave looking fantastically fit after 48 acrobatic/endurance shows, me working slowly back to full fitness with the gym kit we have assembled here, albeit with one leg larger than the other, which Dave affects not to notice!

The spell slightly broken by a thunderstorm last night and this morning (Friday) looks like more rain on the way, but who cares. We’re on vacation!! In our very own ‘Cefn Derwen’!!

This is where we have invested our ‘ill-gotten gains’ from our circus and coaching work over the years. Yes, we have a share in the house back in Tennessee, but that’s not the same as your actual OWN house! Just wish we could be here more often, but all the remaining weeks almost up to Christmas are booked out to holidaymakers, once our month is up.

How we got to this point? See

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

Good beach reading for any gay-friendly sporty folk liking a bit of (mis)adventure thrown in.

As usual, we showcase sporty guys – as much for our own enjoyment as yours:





We’ve the rest of today to enjoy ‘being together’…


Then, this evening, we’ll be having a bit of this with our local gay friends Tom and Iestyn… but probably not on the kitchen table…

table top

(and our cottage does not look quite that ornate, either!)

Tom and Iestyn have been using our weights equipment regularly, so we’ll be keen to check out their progress…



(our gym equipment here isn’t that ornate, either… but we do have the mirrors…)

Maybe out to the beach for some fun before long…



We have our own swimming hole in the river here, of course, but the water is rather low right now…


…but still great for the little tarzans when they get here…


OK. A few more great physiques to finish off the post:

bw speedo lad



fine build

And todays ‘finalist’ seems to have ben in a water fight after being gently oiled… a great BW pic though. Enjoy your day!



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All Mapped Out

By the time you read this, Dave and I, my son Leo and his best friend Chris should be in UK.

My good doctor friend Nate insisted on mapping out my blood flow and pressure in both legs and arms yesterday – eight measurements plus listening to the blood pulsing around my veins through a loudspeaker. This is a guy who wrestles me naked at every opportunity, then turns absurdly professional in his calling when he has me flat out on his table in his office! Thanks, mate. I’m now going to be in the care of ‘Gwasanaeth Iechyd Gymru’, the Welsh health service, which as a Brit I can still get free treatment. Hopefully just monitoring blood levels once or twice as my left leg continues to diminish in size.

Boys to spend a few days in Oxford living at my parents whilst spending time with their other great fitness/gymnast pal Ollie (still absurdly at school, four weeks after the US kids got out for the summer) – Dave and I go more or less straight off to our place in Wales. The next four weeks are ‘all mapped out’ too. Fun and relaxation; Ollie’s family joining us at the weekend.

So: let’s celebrate a ‘fit’ summer break!





beach stretch

bruce weber bromance (5)










volleyball 2

I hope that your summer break is also ‘All Mapped Out’. We just need the British weather to cooperate now – drizzling rain as we landed in London but higher temperatures are promised.

Cover1 ThumbCover2 ThumbCover 3 ThumbI have some important reading to do, also. And, of course, I offer the three volumes shown here (click on for details) for your enlightenment regarding gay love, acrobatics-circus stuff and some adventure, should you need some beach reading yourselves! And, who knows, I may complete a bit more of the new book.

Whatever you do this summer, be sure to enjoy yourselves!




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Bring On the Oxytocin

bw pair

Well, the guys (along with son Leo and Dave’s daughter Jaymee) are back from the circus tour, and we are shortly off to UK.  However, we have just enjoyed 24 hours with the whole ten of us Tuan Jie guys, celebrating our reunion in the customary (gay) way – all sworn ‘clean’ and available to each other. Well, I’ve gone on before about how that works… see the books for how we got it together (links at the end). Of course, a special welcome home for my Dave… skin on skin, said to raise ones oxytocin levels, which is the peptide that brings on that special sense of wellbeing during love making…

So I’m probably ‘high’ on that as well as one the other drugs the medics are currently forcing into me.

Today, then, we celebrate that special maleness and togetherness which gay guys enjoy, with some appropriate ‘fit’ and ‘muscle’ pics.


Add a whiff of pheromones to the oxytocin and we’re really in business:

armpits 5


Whilst we’re on the street bars…


Packing on the muscle in the gym:


Always warm up with just the bar (20kg):


…then move on to the heavier stuff…


Indoor pull-up bars are great workouts too…


Then, of course, the great pleasure in ‘doing it together’… that ‘skin-on-skin’ thing again…

GERMANY. At the Baltic Sea. 1933. Wrestling boys.

…especially the ‘chill-out’ phase…




…sharing your dream – whatever it may be…


Find time, of course, to check out the other guys… Japanese interlude…


Have fun…


…share a healthy diet with your shirtless mates…

011026 (778)

If you get to the beach, check out the talent…


…whilst you stay in training…


Back where we began… a good night’s sleep, loving bodies pressed together…


Oh yes, I nearly forgot…

Links to the ‘Living the Dream’ trilogy, for your beach reading material…

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

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Remember Kadian


Down to Earth with a bump. There I am, banging on about how proud I am of my son in my last post… then the very next day, in my e-version of The London Times, I find a review of the book ‘Kadian Journal’, written by his grieving father. Kadian, at age 14, was riding a bike (which had just had the brakes checked in a local bike shop) on the Berkshire Downs, not far from where my parents live in UK. On a steep downward slope, both brakes failed and, desperately trying to stop, he shot across the main road at the bottom out of control, straight into the path of a van. In front of his father, he was killed instantly.

kadian 1

I cannot begin to imagine how it must feel to lose a son of whom you are so immensely proud. I can tell you, it made me think very hard. How fortunate I am. How I suddenly want to put my arms around my boy and keep him from harm. Always.

Kadian’s father, like me, is also an author, but this book, ‘Kadian Journal, A Father’s Story’, must have been hellish to write. At the same time, perhaps a way of dealing with the grieving process. The reviewer describes the book as ‘A memoir, a threnody, and a love song.’ I am ordering it to be delivered to our Welsh address, and I know there are going to be some tears when I read it over the next few weeks whilst we are there.

kadian%20journalI know I’m always rabbiting on trying to get you guys to buy my books. Not this time. I want you to go and get this book, by Thomas Harding, published by Heinemann at £16.99 in the UK, but available at £13.99 by calling (UK) 0845 271 2134 (The Times Book Shop’). e-book is also available at £8.49. I don’t have prices for US, but it will undoubtedly be available there soon and in other countries too.


You can see the rest of this article, and abridgement of part of the Kadian Journal, HERE.

If you are fortunate enough to have kids, love them and treasure every moment. Each moment could be your last…

When this book arrives, I am going to share it with Leo. A lesson for him, always to be careful and to think of his own safety. A lesson for all of us on how Kadian’s family dealt with his death… Thomas Harding writes: “I am still in the well, but I am climbing now. The walls are wet and slippery, I scrape my knees and elbows on the sharp craggy edges, but I am climbing. I know which way I am going. Up.”

RIP Kadian. You seem to have lived your life to the full, and you deserved better than this.


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