Today, May 17th, is apparently International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia.

Dave and I (and our assorted gay friends) don’t generally do the ‘gay pride’ thing, flaunting our sexuality. Our relationships are much more personal – ‘family orientated’ if you will – after all, most gay couples don’t have a family (kids and their mums) in the way that we do, and our loving caring friends feel like a family too, especially given what we’ve shared over the years.

However, as previous posts have shown, homophobia in ourTennessee neck of the woods seems here to stay, and my son Leo, in particular, seems to have drawn the wrath of the most homophobic parent in the district. Leo is clearly a straight guy with an eye to the girls, and so that seems doubly unfair.

Shannon Boh’s blog (link at foot of page, right hand side) recently provided a possibly timely reminder that maybe we shouldn’t keep our heads in the sand. However, we draw the line at marching through Oak Ridge today and drawing unwelcome attention to ourselves, so I’ve confined my “doing something about it” to this post. Probably not enough, but there we are.

Leo, by the way, is just as good friends with the ‘phobe’s’ son as he ever was despite being banned. Both boys think it’s ridiculous and they just meet up away from the guy’s home. I’d love to be able to say that the ‘phobe’s’ son shows gay tendencies, just to make a point, but he doesn’t! He and Leo, along with their other riends, just seem to be going on about girls all the time. Something that was always lacking in my own experience, for reasons which I came to understand later in my ‘development’ than perhaps I should have done. See ‘Loving the Boy’! The title says it all. In fact, to think of it, I guess publishing the books is my own ‘gay is OK’ statement.

What is so wrong with two guys (or two girls for that matter) loving one another that folks have to get so bitchy about it?

Actually, there is so much more to gay love and friendship than what happens between two guys in bed. The cameraderie combined with mutual respect within our group of friends (mainly performers but not exclusively) means so much too. For us all, being together in a group of guys, just enjoying life together, brings us so much happiness:

(by the way, that picture is called ‘steamy scene’ for all the right reasons!)

Yeah. I didn’t call the second book ‘The Power of Love’ for nothing.

Last pic for today is the kind of gathering we enjoy perhaps most of all: getting fit together for gym training.

Working those abs and getting a little sweaty. Yeah!

About tonycavanagh

Born Northampton UK; school Oxford UK and Oak Ridge Tennessee, where I met my wonderful partner Dave, also from UK. Oak Ridge is our main training base for acrobatics and circus stuff, but we also established a base in Wales (UK) to serve us when we are working in Europe. Our 'story', of finding gay love, learning the acrobatics trade and then of how we got shot at during our show (and worse was to follow - just to prove that the risks of being an acrobat are not always the most obvious ones!) are now available in my three books 'Loving the Boy', 'The Power of Love' and 'Against All Odds'. Links available on most blog posts. Actually, waiting for the imminent arrival of the first printed copies was far scarier than anything we do in performance. A fourth book - not about us but exploring the sadness of a gay Native American boy denied his true identity - is currently with an agent for evaluation. watch for 'Let The Future Find Me' in due time. And now to book five... another boy, another quest... seems its always boys...
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