First Steps: Discovering Love

A rare moment of relaxation for Dave and I last evening, slumped in front of the TV and a couple of beers. Gazing at him, thinking back to the beginning of our love, twelve years ago…

There we were, two British guys thrust together in a US high school, feeling awkward and out of place. Naturally we palled up and, discovering that we both liked gymnastics and training, naturally got together for that as often as the school allowed us.

LIke these two guys, perfectly matched in our sporting interests and abilities, but strangly we didn’t spend our free eveings and weekends together at first. Dave seemed strangely reluctant to invite me to his, but he needed to fix something first which I didn’t know about.

His brother Pete, and Pete’s new gay boyfriend Ivo, had set up a fantastic weights and wrestling cabin at the top of their yard. They were rather protective of their investment, and Dave had to convince them that I deserved ‘admittance’ to the clique. And, behind that clique, was the bigger and secretive group led by Chad (see recent posts!). I knew none of this. Then the fateful day came! The invite to the cabin. Unsure what to wear, I turned up in a muscle top and gym shorts. I received a lecture from Ivo on foot hygeine in the cabin (which I didn’t need!), and then…well, let the book take over…

“‘Well now, Tony,’ said Dave, suddenly surprisingly formal. He never called me anything other than “Tone” before.

 ‘”We’re all boys here. You won’t be needing that, for a start.’ He placed his hands on my hips, under the shirt, and ran them slowly up my sides to the armpits, raising my arms above my head. He continued along my upraised arms, lifting the shirt until my head was completely covered. Just for a moment he stopped, and in that instant I felt something brush across my chest. Could it have been…….. his nose?……… or (surely not?)……… a brushed kiss? Almost immediately his hands completed their journey and lifted the shirt over my head…”

That was the first indication I had that there could be more to Dave than just a gym partner and good friend. Yet the feelings didn’t stir in me right away. We sweated our way through weights and acrobatics. Pete made a bench for me with his naked body to press weights, and feeling our sweaty backs pull apart with a satisfying ‘squelch’ afterwards aroused a different feeling in me, which I couldn’t immediately understand. A sense of brotherhood, perhaps, with what I started to realise was a ‘gay’ scene…?

“‘Sweat-eee…,’ said Dave, running his finger down my back and then sucking it. 

“‘You realise,’ said Pete after a while, ‘That what we do here is just for us? If anyone else asks, we just say we have a few weights here and this is our place to mess around. You understand?’ Although he was grinning still, I sensed that this was serious. Dave was looking at me slightly anxiously…”

Dave was also naked by then and leaving me as the only one of the four wearing any shorts for these ‘manly’ activities. He wasn’t done… Ivo set up the scene for him:

“‘Right,’ he said again. A man of few words. ‘Me and Pete have some big-boy stuff to do out the back. You and Dave can get……’ a momentary pause… … ‘Better acquainted.’ 

“Pete and Ivo left quickly through a door at the rear which led into an enclosed yard. That was as much as I could see, but I guessed that it was probably as secure from prying eyes as the cabin itself. 

“‘Better acquainted?’ I said. ‘What does he mean, “acquainted”?  I’ve known you for more than a month already…..’ 

“‘He means,’ said Dave, slipping his hands on to my hips for the second time that afternoon and pushing my shorts down around my ankles, ‘That you lose these, and we wrestle!’”

It took a few more weeks before Dave said the fateful words to me, which sealed our love for ever. The first time he stayed over at my house with no-one else around:

“And so to bed. I decided I should offer Dave my mother’s choices. 

“‘Dave,’ I giggled, ‘My mum says you can either have the bed in the spare room, or use my room instead. Which is it to be?’ 

“‘Idiot!’ he said, grabbed me by the arm and said ‘Which way to the master’s bed then?’

“And so we climbed into opposite sides of my huge bed, rolled into the middle, and clasped our bodies hard together. 

“‘Oh, Tone, Tone,’ he sighed. ‘Why did it take me so long to find you?’”

I could have said the same to him…

…and we both lived happily ever after…

… except for the shit that fate was to throw at us in the meantime…

…but with the loving, sharing and caring (in our wider group as well as just the two of us), we got through!

Today’s Bonus Boy

About tonycavanagh

Born Northampton UK; school Oxford UK and Oak Ridge Tennessee, where I met my wonderful partner Dave, also from UK. Oak Ridge is our main training base for acrobatics and circus stuff, but we also established a base in Wales (UK) to serve us when we are working in Europe. Our 'story', of finding gay love, learning the acrobatics trade and then of how we got shot at during our show (and worse was to follow - just to prove that the risks of being an acrobat are not always the most obvious ones!) are now available in my three books 'Loving the Boy', 'The Power of Love' and 'Against All Odds'. Links available on most blog posts. Actually, waiting for the imminent arrival of the first printed copies was far scarier than anything we do in performance. A fourth book - not about us but exploring the sadness of a gay Native American boy denied his true identity - is currently with an agent for evaluation. watch for 'Let The Future Find Me' in due time. And now to book five... another boy, another quest... seems its always boys...
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1 Response to First Steps: Discovering Love

  1. Hello there, I discovered your site by way of Google while looking for a similar topic, your site came up, it seems to be great. I have bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.

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