Reflections on Christmas

Although I’m basically of the ‘bah humbug’ persuasion, a lot of good things have happened this Christmas in UK. My mother on Christmas morning, sharing her kitchen with a pair of American lesbians, nattering away nineteen to the dozen and, with glasses of wine in hand, breaking into shrieks of laughter. That’s my mum, one time in denial about her son’s sexuality (and my dad far worse…). Dave and Pete sharing quality time with their once-estranged mother, their dad in attendance. All the grandparents doting over their grandchildren my son Leo and Dave’s daughter Jaymee. And where is all this coming from? Two gay couples, agreeing to ‘mate’ heterosexually just the once, and what joy it has brought us all!

The adventure begins...We tour, we expand, and we meet a few problems along the way...Coming shortly: the denoument...I managed to end the first of my books about finding gay love with a fellow acrobat (Dave) on an editorial ‘cliff-hanger’ – the moment when Dave said ‘OK’ to the deal with the girls. Just two letters. Two letters I was desperate to hear, because I wanted it, but I wanted Dave to be happy even more. Of course there was a whole lot of legal stuff to sort out, but we had good friends in both legal and medical quarters. The second book included the births, and all the emotion that went with that, whilst my final (shorter) ending to the epic, coming out early in 2013, includes the darker side of our adventures but concludes when the children were about two years old.

Recent posts will reveal that we had little free time over Christmas, but I do have the job of finally ‘proofing’ the third book, and then it is all over. Or is it? I do have a fully fictional book in mind with the working title ‘Alex in Wonderland’, so who knows. But I’ll need some serious encouragement to devote time to that.

Meanwhile, the kids approach their eleventh birthdays (Leo on New Year’s day, Jaymee three days later). And we are all so, so proud of them. As keen on sports as we are, skilled in acrobatics, tough… Leo demanded his skinny dipping in the local plunge pool just as soon as we got to our place in Wales, where we are training finally for our local shows.

IMG_5815Air temperature 8C, water temperature 4C, curtains of rain blowing past our barn (gym!) in a gale of wind. He would cheerfully have gone naked across the rough moorland to get there – we all enjoy the feel of rain on our chests I suppose – but I insisted on Speedos just in case anyone else would be about. ‘Unlikely’, said our local farm boy friend Neil who we persuaded to join us after enjoying a joint session on our weights. So what happens – a local fox hunt goes past as we are diving in, followed by a huntsman and a few followers plodding past in about eight layers of waterproofs! I won’t tell you exactly what they said…


running_in_rainToday, after a biblical amount of rain has fallen, the plunge pool is a raging whirlpool of brown peaty turgid water covered in brown froth. Strictly out of bounds, and even Leo can figure out why! But Neil led us around the area on a shirtless run nonetheless – he’s a marathon runner, and he certainly exhausted us with a level of stamina and endurance which goes way beyond ours. But he’s useless at handstands…

running in da rain

So, as more rain hammers on the roof of our little Cefn Derwen We;sh haven, and we’ve got the wood burner going after removing the dead squirrel from inside it (housekeeper Neil’s mum didn’t notice that!), we can get ourselves in tune for our short run of shows here in UK and dream of blue skies and warm sunny days ahead:


…of warmer days by the river, too…


…doing what we love to do for “work” and for play…


…and mabe (New Year resolution?) do a bit of appropriate training to improve our running stamina (thanks, Neil!):

55 (3)

So, as we all look forward to 2013, let me wish you, in no particular order:

(i) Good reading (go on, give those books a try!);

(ii) All you wish for yourselves – happiness in your relationships and in whatever you choose to do;

(iii) Good and successful training in your chosen sport or fitness ideals – that’s why I usually throw in a few

Bonus Boys

at the end of these posts for encouragement…




and, finally, someone suitably wet given our watery theme…



About tonycavanagh

Born Northampton UK; school Oxford UK and Oak Ridge Tennessee, where I met my wonderful partner Dave, also from UK. Oak Ridge is our main training base for acrobatics and circus stuff, but we also established a base in Wales (UK) to serve us when we are working in Europe. Our 'story', of finding gay love, learning the acrobatics trade and then of how we got shot at during our show (and worse was to follow - just to prove that the risks of being an acrobat are not always the most obvious ones!) are now available in my three books 'Loving the Boy', 'The Power of Love' and 'Against All Odds'. Links available on most blog posts. Actually, waiting for the imminent arrival of the first printed copies was far scarier than anything we do in performance. A fourth book - not about us but exploring the sadness of a gay Native American boy denied his true identity - is currently with an agent for evaluation. watch for 'Let The Future Find Me' in due time. And now to book five... another boy, another quest... seems its always boys...
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