‘Foot in Mouth’ Moments

pic88 (3)Friday was another hot and humid day at Cefn Derwen. Ellie took over our kitchen in anticipation of the return of Colin and Natasha, and presented Dave and I with a list of requirements from the  nearest food store. Leo and Chris decided to come with us. Dave and I pulled on vests and trainers for the sake of propriety (!): Leo and Chris (inevitably) wore as little as possible. Just shorts.

And so to the friendly shop in our nearest town here in Wales (Llanwrtyd), the shop where we were introduced to ‘the other gay couple in the village’, Tom and Iestyn, by the kindly and understanding lady owner. She was serving a typically-clad Welsh farmer – flat cap, smelly tweed jacket, canvas overtrousers and muddy wellies. Unsurprisingly, the farmer was sweating like a pig, too – practically dripping on to the counter – but friendly enough as well.

Having collected our basket of stuff, we found that the nice lady was just finishing with the farmer, who grinned cheerfully at us:

‘So you’re the lads from Cefn Derwen, then…’

We responded cheerfully and went to the other assistant, a surly schoolgirl on vacation. As she rang up our purchases she stared at the boys.

‘Don’t they have shoes to come into the shop?’

I was a bit annoyed at that and, as the farmer closed the door and the nice lady started paying attention, I responded:

‘I’m sure that my son’s clean feet are less of a health hazard to your shop than the sheep muck and mud on that gentleman’s wellies…’

A pause. Then she wasn’t done with us:

‘Son? I thought that you two were…’ She broke off, but the missing word was obvious. ‘Gay.’

The nice lady owner was glaring furiously at the girl, but Dave was fired up now.

‘Yes we are. But they were offering kids at Builth market at two for the price of one and the offer seemed too good to pass up.’

Both I and the nice lady creased up with laughter at that, the noxious girl was pushed aside and our purchase completed.

‘The boys are fine as they are, dear. And I hope that Jaymee is OK?’

The nice lady, indeed, knows all about us! But, as we closed the door, I saw her face go tense as she set about the girl…

Cover1 ThumbCover2 ThumbThe ‘real’ story of how my partner Dave comes to have a beautiful daughter Jaymee and I a son Leo can be found in either the printed version or e-version of these two little epics – in fact, the decision point forms the’ cliffhanger’ at the end of Part 1 (something which my local Welsh writing mentor advised because I had written the story as one damn long thing…). Within those pages can be found lots about finding gay love, our gymnastic interests and performing acrobatic career, our ongoing fitness interests, and some other adventures…

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…and, as the author of three books now with a fourth maybe on the way, I am bound to suggest, am I not, that you can always combine a good read with your workout, as suggested here in this slightly squalid ‘building-site gym’ environment!…

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pic88 (3)and, finally...On Saturday, after Colin had arrived, there was another ‘foot-in-mouth moment, and this time it was Colin’s fault. He was reminiscing (with the adults) about he and I as 9-year-olds getting involved with some other boys in a pissing competition by the Cherwell River in Oxford which ended up with us pissing on each other.  Quite how this came up in conversation I’m not sure! Leo, earwigging as usual, then says to Ollie (presently 9yo):

‘That’s right, they do it all the time!’

Well, it is true that, once upon a time, there were a couple of videos out there (happily long out of print) featuring Dave and I (or, at least, our alter egos), and we do subscribe to the Russian view that pee makes an excellent anti-wrinkle skin treatment, especially as we expose an awful lot to the sun…

So now we have Ollie wanting the other boys to pee on him as a finale to his ‘initiation’ into the boys gang… sounds alarmingly like the initiation demanded by Chad to get into his gym back in Oak Ridge, but dumbed down for the young ‘uns! I expect they’ve done it by now, then been in the river to wash off (or in the rain, which has been torrential today)…

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How can we really complain, given that the three boys have had such a fun time, even writing and signing a contract of lifetime friendship, which will be hard for Ollie to keep up with him in Oxford and the rest of us back in the States, but we’ll see. And given that us adults have been getting up to stuff after the kids ‘lights out’ in our barn gym…?

Ellie and her two girls had to leave today, but Colin, Tash, Ollie and his younger sister are staying a few more days, so plenty of fun still to be had, and then Dave’s mum (Jaymee’s doting grandma) will be next). So, plenty of time to chill:

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…to work out with Colin…

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…to do some gymnastics…

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and there are plenty other ways to keep fit and get sweaty here, come rain…

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…or shine…

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And, of course, when Dave and I are finally alone and the rest of the house is sleeping, there’ll be time for another of those delicious ‘foot in mouth’ moments!

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About tonycavanagh

Born Northampton UK; school Oxford UK and Oak Ridge Tennessee, where I met my wonderful partner Dave, also from UK. Oak Ridge is our main training base for acrobatics and circus stuff, but we also established a base in Wales (UK) to serve us when we are working in Europe. Our 'story', of finding gay love, learning the acrobatics trade and then of how we got shot at during our show (and worse was to follow - just to prove that the risks of being an acrobat are not always the most obvious ones!) are now available in my three books 'Loving the Boy', 'The Power of Love' and 'Against All Odds'. Links available on most blog posts. Actually, waiting for the imminent arrival of the first printed copies was far scarier than anything we do in performance. A fourth book - not about us but exploring the sadness of a gay Native American boy denied his true identity - is currently with an agent for evaluation. watch for 'Let The Future Find Me' in due time. And now to book five... another boy, another quest... seems its always boys...
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4 Responses to ‘Foot in Mouth’ Moments

  1. Paul says:

    You young men are beautiful indeed; the story is fun. By the way it’s Colin and me, not

  2. You are going absolutely excellent. Im insisted to visit your blog even in my busy schedule. Now this story is awesome too. I hope i will read your complete blog today.

  3. Pingback: Barefoot Bacteria: NS3 | Tony Cavanagh

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