Twelve Reasons…


As regular readers will be well aware, Dave and I are having to evaluate our options for the future. To stay in USA or to return to UK is the basic question, and it comes up whenever we are together – in the gym, in the car, in bed…

Don’t want to bore you (so plenty of pictures coming to keep your attention!) as we contemplate our options…

how it should be

…from every perspective…


…wondering if…


…we can get the balance right…


Six Reasons to Stay

(1)  We’re blessed (as gay guys) with two wonderful kids who were born here in the USA, live here and attend school here;

(2)  We have an amazing group of gay (and straight) friends into fitness as we are, with whom we train and perform;

(3)  We have the right of residence and to work here, with jobs in sport as well as occasional shows to perform in;

(4)  We have offers of places to live when Dave’s dad sells his house and moves back to UK – for example, Pete (Dave’s bro) and his partner Ivo could afford to buy somewhere and let us rent part of it;

(5)  We (largely) enjoy the climate, apart from the humidity at the height of summer, and the relatively relaxed lifestyle;

(6)  We have access to the most amazing gay-friendly private gym in the world, and could transfer the kit from our domestic training cabin there too…


top light

On the other hand…


Six Reasons to Go

(1)  We own a house in UK (Wales) and would quite like to have the opportunity to enjoy it;

(2)  Increasing responsibilities to parents (all in UK) as they get older;

(3)  We can work as sports coaches (or anything else) since we are UK citizens;

(4)  Kids have dual nationality and so could spend lots of time with us, at least in vacations whilst still in school and longer periods after;

(5)  We have amazing friends in UK too, some gay (living locally to our place) and the others gay-friendly;

(6)  With the help of a local group of lads (and ladettes) we’ve been building up our own gym in the barn at Cefn Derwen so we would never be short of opportunities to train…


The local lads in Wales are getting into wrestling too, just as we are here (I’m still sore from the holds Carlos managed to put on me on Sunday at the exhibition matches)…

SP010501 (1)

…and the local Welsh river can substitute for our regular skinny dipping in the Clinch River (albeit a little colder most of the time – “we can take it”!!)…


Cover1 ThumbCover2 ThumbCover 3 ThumbIf I decide to carry on writing books, I could do that anywhere…

…and, hey, there’s a thought: the working title of my fourth opus, loosely based upon what we got to know of our Native American friend ‘Three Rivers’ is ‘Let the Future Find Me’ – now, is that coincidence or WHAT?

I can tell you that our favoured option for our own future, is kind of exactly that… let it all evolve around us. Ducking the issue, and contemplating ‘commuting’ back and forth between the Two Oak Ridges – the city in Tennessee and the Welsh equivalent Cefn Derwen which translates as the exact same thing. The only thing is… that’s going to COST!! The late Sir David Frost used to commute twice a week on Concord, but we’re not (ahem) exactly in that financial league here. And banking on a lottery win in the UK Lotto is probably not a sensible option either…

OK, so this gets us little further forward. No-one has shown any interest in the house here yet – not least because they want to make hundreds redundant at the local laboratory (ORNL), so it’s a bad time for Dave’s dad to be selling up (and he’s one who is taking the opportunity to leave after 13 years, being originally assigned there from the British nuclear industry).

As for Dave and I, well, whatever happens, we’ve got US. Two guys in perfect harmony, seemingly about everything, whether it be training:





…or just, as we gay guys would have it, being ourselves…


OK, thinking time over for today. Time to do something more useful!

About tonycavanagh

Born Northampton UK; school Oxford UK and Oak Ridge Tennessee, where I met my wonderful partner Dave, also from UK. Oak Ridge is our main training base for acrobatics and circus stuff, but we also established a base in Wales (UK) to serve us when we are working in Europe. Our 'story', of finding gay love, learning the acrobatics trade and then of how we got shot at during our show (and worse was to follow - just to prove that the risks of being an acrobat are not always the most obvious ones!) are now available in my three books 'Loving the Boy', 'The Power of Love' and 'Against All Odds'. Links available on most blog posts. Actually, waiting for the imminent arrival of the first printed copies was far scarier than anything we do in performance. A fourth book - not about us but exploring the sadness of a gay Native American boy denied his true identity - is currently with an agent for evaluation. watch for 'Let The Future Find Me' in due time. And now to book five... another boy, another quest... seems its always boys...
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1 Response to Twelve Reasons…

  1. Muscleguy says:

    Gawd that pic of you two in the bed is soooo nice, you both are awesomely beautiful men.

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