There and Back Again

One of those slightly irritating conversations with my parents last night, about our future plans to spend more time in the UK if we can find ways of earning some money. Along the lines of ‘If only you’de done so-and-so…’ – not stayed in America, followed the physics career my dad wanted, and so on and so… parents can be SO annoying sometimes. At least we didn’t get to the ‘If only you’de been straight’ line… even my parents know that that is forbidden territory.

Cover2 ThumbI recorded my struggles to come out – over the washing up in my parents Oxford kitchen – in the second of my three books about our acrobatic lifestyle and our gay love (click on cover for more info!). My grandparents had been far shrewder that I realised, and already knew – and supported us – my parents struggled. Later, in a restaurant in Pretoria, without Dave there to support me, I let slip that I was fathering a child… with a lesbian, OMG!

Well, that’s water under the bridge. Going back over old ground doesn’t rally help much: my parents, as they grow older, clearly want to see more of me (us) – including Dave, who they’ve grown to love and accept, Leo, who they cannot see enough of, and even his mum (and Dave’s ‘parallel’ family too), and they’re sensitive to my concern that they’ll need more attention from me as they grow older. So we didn’t have a row, but it was not the best evening of my life I suppose.

The one thing they DO love is that we bought Cefn Derwen, which they had visited for years, on holidays. We all love it here, and they agree that us having this UK base is a great idea, and will do what they can to find appropriate sources of income for us when we’re here. Not sure what, but at least we’re on the same team again.

Looking back can be fun, in appropriate circumstances. Looking back and wishing things had been done differently (and we don’t!) doesn’t help at all.

Looking AT backs, then, our picture theme for today!


Somehow, the work that lifters put into their back muscles doesn’t get the exposure that chests and abs do, so today I’ll try and make up for that. Lats, rhomboids, traps and rear deltoids are all essential strength units in doing acrobatics, after all, and pull-ups are a great exercise for all of them…


Those Russian street workout areas offer huge potential and produce some amazing bodies, and of course the ‘ordinary’ gym has everything you need too:



Now there’s a gym with an interesting décor!

You can get a mate to take some great pictures of you at home – especially when you know you’ve got what it takes:


…show off your suntan at the same time…


Maybe the photographer can put you in a studio and enhance you musculature with some effective lighting:

back lighting

…or you can just make do with the bathroom, so long as a friend with a camera joins you!

back muscle

Great proportions there… and here:

Built 11

You can use the lighting (or in this case, limited lighting!) in a gym hall to great effect too:

Darkness Falls

Look at the rhomboids and trapezius at work here in this ‘dead lift’ arrangement:


A selfie can be effective, especially when the light works for you too (and exactly matches his hair!)…




…well, if you’ve got it, flaunt it!

And now some random ones:




May the force be with you!


And, of course, all the time we should have FUN. The water temperature here is currently 3C and, yes, we’ve been in it a couple of times:


The title of this post, by the way, is a quote: the sub-title of Tolkein’s Hobbit. A great read, but the recent films have departed too much from the written word for our taste. And, of course, we do promote the written word (even when it is an e-book): here you have a choice of either! Have a great day.

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

PS: our fave pic here is #6, the tanned boy. Yours?


About tony

Born Northampton UK
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