On Being a Male…

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What is it about being a (gay) Male? The word ‘gay’ may not be too important here…

Is it about being ‘tough’…?

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It’s not all about ‘big muscles’, is it…?

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No, it’s not. For me, it is about being proud to be one of the species, and having a never-ending sense of amazement that others of the species accept me as ‘good enough’ to be one of them. Does that make sense?

I never cease to be amazed that Dave, my beautiful partner, whom I want to be with more than anything else in the world, puts up with me.

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This very morning, he woke me by gently nuzzling my armpit – that innermost haven of male aroma! – then embarked on a most wonderful session of massage, helping my somewhat ageing frame (30+!!) to recover from the exertions of Friday night

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…licking the points on my back where the darts went in (they’re special ones for the show, they don’t really hurt much) before getting out his oil bottle… then, later, when I am practically asleep again with the ecstasy he brings me, rolling me on to my back…

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…then lifting my legs and sitting butt-to-butt so that we can each work on the other’s feet… Dave has beautiful feet, lickable, suckable… “toes needing tongues”, someone put it… and I never, ever, ever, need worry about Dave’s foot hygiene…

That thing about ‘acceptance’ and respect. We are proud to be senior members of Chad’s private gym. A place where guys who want to be guys can do exactly that. No shirts allowed – we want to see those muscles.

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Nakedness positively encouraged, both for the weight training and the wrestling, the main attractions. The other guys inspire us, that’s the idea. And it works.

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Of course, naked guys working out together means two things. It means a focus on personal hygiene at the start of the session… if your wrestle partner is going to sit bare-butt on your face, well, you don’t want issues. And then we sweat. All of us. A lot. It’s part of the deal.

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If you don’t end up with a damp chest, stomach and back, you aren’t working out hard enough. Public gyms have a paranoia about sweat on the benches and equipment – “wear a shirt!!!” and “use a towel” scream the signs. Not at Chad’s. You can hardly wrestle another guy without getting his sweat all over you and yours over him… so what’s the issue? The benches can get cleaned off, we’re all there to work out till we drip… so we’re just going to get on with it, no mucking around…

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At Chad’s towels are strictly for after the showers…

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…except for the duty roster detail, who always have a great deal of cleaning up to do – sweat (and sanitizing the equipment), wrestle oil to mop up… and the (gay) rest…

Finally, what ‘makes it’ for me is the camaraderie of other males around me, all with similar aims, supporting, encouraging…

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…wanting your mates to achieve the same as you…

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…and, almost certainly if you’re gay, enjoying their touch…

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So that’s it, really. Me, what I am, what I enjoy. And Dave, of course, And the rest…

…oh! I nearly forgot…

reminder!

I can’t ignore eight shirtless boys, now, can I? Yeah, the book adverts:

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

 Cover 3 ThumbHalf a million words altogether, and a thriller storyline on the back of it all. Bye till next time!

About tonycavanagh

Born Northampton UK; school Oxford UK and Oak Ridge Tennessee, where I met my wonderful partner Dave, also from UK. Oak Ridge is our main training base for acrobatics and circus stuff, but we also established a base in Wales (UK) to serve us when we are working in Europe. Our 'story', of finding gay love, learning the acrobatics trade and then of how we got shot at during our show (and worse was to follow - just to prove that the risks of being an acrobat are not always the most obvious ones!) are now available in my three books 'Loving the Boy', 'The Power of Love' and 'Against All Odds'. Links available on most blog posts. Actually, waiting for the imminent arrival of the first printed copies was far scarier than anything we do in performance. A fourth book - not about us but exploring the sadness of a gay Native American boy denied his true identity - is currently with an agent for evaluation. watch for 'Let The Future Find Me' in due time. And now to book five... another boy, another quest... seems its always boys...
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One Response to On Being a Male…

  1. ian williams says:

    You have excelled yourself this time. Brilliant!!

    Ian.

    On Mon, May 19, 2014 at 2:38 PM, Tony Cavanagh

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