On Being a Male…


What is it about being a (gay) Male? The word ‘gay’ may not be too important here…

Is it about being ‘tough’…?


It’s not all about ‘big muscles’, is it…?


No, it’s not. For me, it is about being proud to be one of the species, and having a never-ending sense of amazement that others of the species accept me as ‘good enough’ to be one of them. Does that make sense?

I never cease to be amazed that Dave, my beautiful partner, whom I want to be with more than anything else in the world, puts up with me.


This very morning, he woke me by gently nuzzling my armpit – that innermost haven of male aroma! – then embarked on a most wonderful session of massage, helping my somewhat ageing frame (30+!!) to recover from the exertions of Friday night

massage 45419

…licking the points on my back where the darts went in (they’re special ones for the show, they don’t really hurt much) before getting out his oil bottle… then, later, when I am practically asleep again with the ecstasy he brings me, rolling me on to my back…

massage 2

…then lifting my legs and sitting butt-to-butt so that we can each work on the other’s feet… Dave has beautiful feet, lickable, suckable… “toes needing tongues”, someone put it… and I never, ever, ever, need worry about Dave’s foot hygiene…

That thing about ‘acceptance’ and respect. We are proud to be senior members of Chad’s private gym. A place where guys who want to be guys can do exactly that. No shirts allowed – we want to see those muscles.


Nakedness positively encouraged, both for the weight training and the wrestling, the main attractions. The other guys inspire us, that’s the idea. And it works.


Of course, naked guys working out together means two things. It means a focus on personal hygiene at the start of the session… if your wrestle partner is going to sit bare-butt on your face, well, you don’t want issues. And then we sweat. All of us. A lot. It’s part of the deal.


7092 sweaty pecs

If you don’t end up with a damp chest, stomach and back, you aren’t working out hard enough. Public gyms have a paranoia about sweat on the benches and equipment – “wear a shirt!!!” and “use a towel” scream the signs. Not at Chad’s. You can hardly wrestle another guy without getting his sweat all over you and yours over him… so what’s the issue? The benches can get cleaned off, we’re all there to work out till we drip… so we’re just going to get on with it, no mucking around…



At Chad’s towels are strictly for after the showers…

zack 09

…except for the duty roster detail, who always have a great deal of cleaning up to do – sweat (and sanitizing the equipment), wrestle oil to mop up… and the (gay) rest…

Finally, what ‘makes it’ for me is the camaraderie of other males around me, all with similar aims, supporting, encouraging…

good audience

…wanting your mates to achieve the same as you…


…and, almost certainly if you’re gay, enjoying their touch…

massage 3

So that’s it, really. Me, what I am, what I enjoy. And Dave, of course, And the rest…

…oh! I nearly forgot…


I can’t ignore eight shirtless boys, now, can I? Yeah, the book adverts:

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

 Cover 3 ThumbHalf a million words altogether, and a thriller storyline on the back of it all. Bye till next time!

About tony

Born Northampton UK
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1 Response to On Being a Male…

  1. ian williams says:

    You have excelled yourself this time. Brilliant!!


    On Mon, May 19, 2014 at 2:38 PM, Tony Cavanagh

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