On Being Gay Parents…


That could be me, or Dave, pondering. It isn’t, but no matter!

Another post inspired by reading my British newspapers online. Two lesbians, who have a child (one of them the natural mother), are fighting in the courts. The biological mother, having split from her partner, has taken the child overseas. The remaining partner is suing on the grounds of ‘parental rights’. I guess this situation is a potential minefield for any gay couple – perhaps even those who adopt, where such is permitted – if there is a split.

It made me ponder our situation. Two gay dads, two lesbian moms, and our two kids. The kids spent their early years mainly with their moms in one household, but a significant amount of time with us, their dads. One lesbian and one gay parent per child, obviously, and both ‘biological’. Well, maybe not obviously, but so it was. See the books (below!). And the kids were almost always together, and grew up thinking of themselves as brother and sister – and very nearly as twins. Just four days apart, in fact.

A couple of years ago circumstances changed, and the households combined in what was originally Dave’s father’s house. The one with the training cabin at the top of the yard, in which we all spend so much time. So our kids – now almost 14 years old – live each with their mom and their dad – in fact, they more or less have two moms and dads each. Happily we do not plan to split, in any manner. So, thank God (if there is one), everyone is happy. Me, in regard to my son Leo… I’m deliriously happy!

Yes, our situation is unusual… and there is another gay couple in the same (thankfully large) house, Dave’s brother Pete and his partner. We all get along. That’s because we all share the same interests – fitness, acrobatics, performing…



(best use for a garage if you don’t have a training cabin like us!)

Very occasionally the unusual situation of our kids can turn round and bite them… I’ve narrated various issues in this blog… but ask them if they are happy and I know what answer you will get. And they are old enough to defend themselves against any homophobic abuse, which happens occasionally even though they are both as straight as they come (which some people cannot accept even as possible, with them having gay parents). Even more, I’m proud to say, I get to hear of them defending us as well, although they don’t easily talk about it. But, treating them as adults pays handsomely…

I think we’re ALL blessed, really.

Those books then, which explain how Leo and Jaymee came to be:

Loving the Boy: ISBN 978-1-907732-30-0

The Power of Love: ISBN 978-1-907732-41-6

Against All Odds: ISBN 978-1-908645-35-7

You can get e-books if you prefer. Same ISBNs.

And now the fitness ‘promotion’ continues!



undersear lifter


young lifter






…and finally, for today, another ‘double act’ (no implied sexuality!).

oily posers

Oiled for the photo? Or have they been wrestling? the background guy has a strange look… Your guess is as good as ours…

…and that wraps up today’s post!



About tony

Born Northampton UK
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2 Responses to On Being Gay Parents…

  1. finnwest2015 says:

    What a beautiful blog. I look forward to following.

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